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Monday, January 25, 2010

aLonE? nEveR !

For how many times that i posted on this blog site that I am lonely, sad and hurt, I think it's time to do something for a change.

Who says that Miss Lady Asrah Carim is a LONER ONE? NO WAY!

I was blind, I guess. I didn't see the real wealth that I have. I focused on myself and my heart. It doesn't mean that if I was left by Mark, i am now alone? That's silly. He's not my world. He doesn't even deserve it. Anyway, when I had myself hooked into a selfish relationship with Mark, there I was really alone. Because, I thought that I had no other friends aside form him, I had no family, well I have but I didn't know that then. It was a whole foolishness! My family was never gone, they were there to support me, and to advice and to try to tell me that I am in a deep problem, and I really was. I was just too naive to see that. I had my friends, waiting for me to come near them, but I didn't, I thought they were too far to reach, yet the fact was they were hoping that I would give them some attention. Myself? Where was my self? I agree that I lost my mind. I didn't love myself. I loved him more that I love ME. Insanity, right? Those times, I had him. But now, where is he? There, laughing at a corner, being proud that he got me served. And GOD? I thought He didn't care. I thought He would consider us. But thanks to Him, he took my feet out of the MUD.

Everything, when I was still with Mark, was with me. I have ALL THAT I NEED. I was just too selfish to turn away from them, for Mark's sake. Now, I still have that everything, except for the main reason that I took it for granted, the man that I loved, is now gone.

BUT I AM NEVER ALONE =)

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